By Joy A. Kennelly
I always find it interesting how life imitates art (or in this case film and books I've been reading parallel my life.)
I recently finished reading Losing My Religion: How I Lost My Faith Reporting on Religion in America - and Found Unexpected Peace by LA Times Journalist, William Lobdell. The very next day, I started working for CrossRoad Ministries on a part-time basis.
Ironic, eh? God works in mysterious ways. LOL
I enjoyed reading Bill's book after meeting him at the screening of Lord, Save Us from Your Followers by Filmmaker aka "Bumper Sticker Man", Dan Merchant. I had received a random invite because I love politics which I thought was the premise of this film which would be interesting.
Man, was I wrong about the premise!
It is so much more, although there are funny interviews with Al Franken and other politicos. However, it deals with much deeper philosophical issues than normally discussed in polite circles because religion is such a verboten topic.
But someone has to deal with it! The subtitle is: Why is the Gospel of Love Dividing America? to give you a better idea of the concept.
I think Dan's film is opening up a dialog between those with faith and those without like nothing has before. This film is fair, personal, funny, insightful, heartbreaking, thought-provoking, and really makes you contemplate your own faith which rarely happens in myopic circles.
I highly recommend seeing it if you can. Here's an email Dan recently received from someone who enjoyed the film: "I just saw the movie today and was blown away. I am not a Christian
and if I may, I would like to confess to and apologize for the
condesceding manner in which I viewed Christians before seeing this
movie.
Regardless of how much I might disagree with the more "angry" of
your faith, I realize that I am just as bad as I believe them to be if I
behave in the same manner. I think that this the most important movie
to come out in years.
I laughed, I cried but most importantly, I
thought. My wife and I walked out of the theatre speachless and pretty
choked up. Thank you for making this movie."
If you're in the LA area, Lord, Save Us From Your Followers is currently playing in Irvine. Worth the drive. Believe me. All the details on all the other theatres it's playing in can be found here.
Back to Bill Lodbell and his book...
Bill was a guest on the panel held after the film screening representing himself as someone intimately familiar with Christian and Catholic faith, yet was so turned off reporting on the corruption of the Catholic Church's handling of the sex scandals for the Los Angeles Times, he "lost" his faith.
The film panel moderator only casually mentioned this book, Losing My Religion, choosing to keep the main focus on the film during the panel discussion despite the other panelist Michael Levine's best efforts to derail it and keep the focus on himself. (As he always does. OY!)
The title of Bill's book intrigued me though. I'm always open to hearing other people's faith experience and told him that I would read it when we met afterward.
I had no idea what was in store by making this promise.
If you're like me, you probably heard about the sex scandals of the Catholic Church and let it slide over your head because you were caught up in other things at the time. However, reading this book, you aren't able to ignore the atrocities committed by supposed men of God.
I was sick to my stomach almost to the point of vomiting and began crying when reading some of the realities of what actually went on, and apparently is still going on, in the bowels of the Catholic Church in the name of God against children and others.
Have to admit, if I were Bill and new to my faith, I probably would have walked away too. Never to look back. However, I've been a Christian since I was a young child, attended a Christian liberal arts college, and received a Certificate in Bible from Montana Wilderness Bible College.
As a result, I am very familiar with the foibles of the Church.
Perhaps more than some, but definitely not to the extent Bill has by reporting on it as extensively as he has. His faith was shattered. It's easy to happen when you focus on man rather than God. Only God has never let me down even in my darkest hours.
Man? Plenty of times. But it's not about what humans do when contemplating your faith. It's what you do and how you take the challenges to deepen your faith. Here's an excerpt from another blogger who explains this concept so beautifully: When Your Faith is Tested
"When we have no strength to carry on, when disappointment and discouragement take hold of us, we find that our only way through it all depends upon our faith. We find our faith being tested as we endure suffering that may be physical, mental, social, financial, or all of them combined.
So what are we to do when our faith is tested? Will your faith pass the test? The testing of your faith is an opportunity, not an obstacle.
God’s purpose for allowing the trials in your life is to strengthen
you, not destroy you. He has promised that His plans for you are for
good; He has promised to complete the work He has begun in you; He has
promised to never leave you nor forsake you; He has promised to be a
ready help in times of trouble….believe what He has promised, God is not a liar."
"Be assured and understand that the trial and proving of your faith bring out endurance and steadfastness and patience." James 1:3 Amp version
So, how do we pass the test? How can be we stand strong in our faith
when our world is falling out from under us? When there’s nothing we
can do, when it all lies in God’s hands, we can remain steadfast in our
faith by:
*Focusing Forward." And it goes on from there. Click here to continue reading the positive, life-affirming encouragement Cherie Hill gives in her blog on the topic, "When Your Faith is Tested." I really liked what she had to say.
For whatever reason, despite everything I've experienced in my Christian walk (how do you like that Christianese? LOL) I have kept my faith throughout the years. Unfortunately, Bill lost his.
As Pastor Tim Rowlands from River Oaks Community Church, who also bravely read Bill's book, said in his sermon "I'm learning my faith can be tested" about Losing My Religion, Bill made the mistake of ending his close relationship with other Christians, he stopped reading his Bible, and he chose to stop attending church.
What Tim doesn't point out in his sermon is that during the entire time of Bill's investigation of the Catholic Church he was also taking classes to become a part of the Catholic Church. Counter-productive wouldn't you say?
I can totally understand where Bill is coming from because of that hypocrisy. However, one's faith should never be built on an institution, but on God and His relationship to you and your life. Switch churches, confront the issue, do what it takes, but realize it's your decision to turn away, not God's.
Reading Bill's book reminded me of the scripture which reads (according to Anthony Delgado and his blog):
“Listen then to what the parable of the sower means: When anyone hears
the message about the kingdom and does not understand it, the evil one
comes and snatches away what was sown in his heart. This is the seed
sown along the path.
The one who received the seed that fell on rocky
places is the man who hears the word and at once receives it with joy.
But since he has no root, he lasts only a short time.
When trouble or persecution comes because of the word, he quickly falls
away.
The one who received the seed that fell among the thorns is the
man who hears the word, but the worries of this life and the
deceitfulness of wealth choke it, making it unfruitful.
But the one who
received the seed that fell on good soil is the man who hears the word
and understands it. He produces a crop, yielding a hundred, sixty or
thirty times what was sown.” (Matt 13:18-23, NIV)
I couldn't help but also remember the words spoken by Pastor Zac of Hope Chapel in Hermosa Beach who said, "Living the Christian life isn't so much a sub-culture as it is counter-culture." It's not easy to go against what society does and says is acceptable behavior when the Bible says it isn't.
It's not easy to do everything the Bible commands one to do either - like "love your enemies, do good to those who persecute you," or "no sex before marriage," or "do not take the Lord's name in vain," or "whatsoever things are true, good and pure, think on those things" and any other number of commands from the Bible.
I chose some that I struggle with, but you can choose your own poison. It's not an easy life to live. That's why I enjoyed reading Losing My Religion so much. This is Bill's personal experience with his own spiritual walk and he opted out. People do it all the time.
However, that said, I don't think anyone has so gracefully, honestly, or thoughtfully portrayed this life struggle as Bill has done which is why I highly recommend reading it wherever you are in your spiritual life journey.
I think more people need to know how duplicitious the Catholic Church can be about moving priests from parish to parish while hiding their horrible predatory actions on young, defenseless children which I hope doesn't continue.
I think more people need to read about the hypocrisy of Benny Hinn's healing ministry and the falseness of the Mormon faith, etc. These truths need to be exposed.
That said, here's a review from a blog called The MediaReport which points out the fallacies in Lodbell's theory regarding the Catholic Church's doctrine which I can't dispute since I'm not as intimately familiar, but apparently this writer is.
(The whole blog is devoted to examining The LA Times and today's media which explains the pan.)
And before we throw the baby out with the bath water concerning the Catholic Church, let's not forget, as this blogger also points out: "The Catholic Church, despite the faults of its members,
remains the largest single charitable organization in the world - by
far. (CNEWA,
Catholic Relief Services,
Catholic Charities,
Catholic World Mission,
CMMB,
C-Fam,
ICMC,
Cross
International Catholic Outreach, and the
Bishop Gassis
Fund are just some of the organizations I came up with at the top of
my head just sitting here at the computer.)"
I love that Bill is a journalist first and foremost in this memoir. It's not all touchy feely, but logical. That said, faith isn't always logical. You can't always explain why people have it, while others don't. To quote the Media Report reviewer: "The great Fr. John Corapi has said, 'Christianity is not a wimp religion.'
Half of me sees Lobdell's actions as those of a wimp loser.
Yet the other
half - the more rational side - simply realizes that Lobdell never
understood his faith to begin with. He is woefully ignorant of the basic
tenets of the Christian
faith and what it means to be a Christian."
I agree to a certain extent, but also feel that a person's faith in God is between them and God. "Judge not, lest you be judged." However, if what that blogger says is true, that Lodbell has taken certain Catholic precepts out of context to suit his own bias, then that is wrong and needs to be exposed too.
I'm still haunted after reading Lodbell's book about the entire Alaskan city that was devastated by a Catholic priest sent there in exile for previous pedophile activity who molested all the children in the village with no one stopping him.
Or the woman who had to sue a priest for child payments since he refused to
acknowledge the child as his who would have gotten away with
skipping out on this responsibilty except Bill wrote about it in the LA
Times.
Here's what the Christian Science Monitor said about these two pivotal moments in Lodbell's spiritual life: "He began experiencing “a dark night of the soul.” Two other assignments
became crowning blows: a reporting trip to St. Michael’s Island in
Alaska, where “a single Catholic missionary raped an entire generation
of Alaska Native boys”; and a court case in Portland, Ore., in which a
priest and his order were refusing to give sufficient support to the
son the priest had fathered and his destitute mother."
Click here for the entire review.
The St. Michael's church is but a shell of what it used to be because of this horrible priest, but there is one Eskimo man Bill interviewed who despite everything, believes that God is who he says he is and this man has a deep, abiding faith that hasn't been shaken.
Even though Bill has left the church and renounced his faith, I believe he is doing God's will by continuing to report on crimes in the church. That's justice that needs to be served.
If Bill feels it necessary to remove himself from those he is reporting to do what he needs to do, then so be it. It is so crucial for a journalist to maintain their objectivity to report accurately on a story and so many times it's lost due to a personal bias. Perhaps once the Catholic Church is rid of all pedophiles then Bill's mission in life will be done and he will see things in a different light? :)
Many people who have seemingly walked away from their faith for years and years often come back once their own scars have been healed. I've stepped away myself, but always come back.
I can't say for sure though, nor do I care to judge Bill for his life choice because it's between him and God. I encourage everyone who is curious about life as a Christian, or is one already, to read this book because it will challenge you, inspire you, and make you evaluate your faith and what it means to you.
But read it with the idea that this is one person's experience and doesn't reflect the entire Christian experience. There are many who see evil in this world and remain faithful to God even when there's no humanly reason to do so.
I encourage you to also read Scott L. Peck's book, People of the Lie, Hope for Healing Human evil, for another exploration of evil you might not have considered if you're still interested in this issue. I read it years ago and still remember it because of it's deep analysis of evil.
I have been encouraged to read C.S. Lewis' book, Surprised by Joy, as an exploration of faith which I plan to do next because although there is a lot of bad in the world and the church, there is also a lot of good.
I choose to cling to the good and move beyond the evil that is in the world. What about you?
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